I like to think of myself as a positive person. Lately I have been a wee bit “stuck”. I have not been feeling my usual energy, have gained some weight which adds to the “sluggish” and have just had a very “not caring” feeling lately.
The usual things that bring me joy are creating, yoga, teaching, being with family, and hugging my pets. One thing I especially find joy in is singing. I have sung with a jazz band for 23 years now and have found myself dreading performances and rehearsals and even contemplating leaving the band. I am not finding the joy in anything lately.
In a search for it I have really sat in contemplation for weeks now and my angels have been whispering “ask”. I have ignored their guidance big time and was really rocked when a mentor and spiritual leader in the community had announced a total shift in beliefs where it found me questioning everything.
I finally asked my angels (yes I forget sometimes). The unfolding of miracles has been amazing. Now it has not been “harps, hallows and the hallelujah chorus”, just small shifts and signs. I really think the angels were easing me into this because it has been so long and truly I have been in a funk.
I went to band practice last night. The leader gave me a new song, one I really could get excited about. I thought, “ok I can do this”. Practice was actually fun and my fellow band mates were having fun and I could feel the joy in their hearts as well as a growing joy in mine.
I kept trying to eat some sweets. I dropped the same piece of candy on the floor 3 times before I got the hint! (thank you angels)
A friend’s birthday was yesterday so I stepped into my sewing room to make something for her. There was that joy again.
Going to my yoga class where I am a student has increased my joy making me affirm that self-care is part of this. I was even given some extra time today to come home and enjoy the peace.
It’s been little subtle things along the way but I can feel the joy coming back.
Losing my mom last year has been challenging and I now allow myself to grieve and see the joy in my tears. I was lucky enough to have a loving mom who I miss but I can feel her presence.
The joy is making its way back and the biggest gift I have received from this time is knowing I am not alone, being reminded to ask the angels for help always, and allow myself to feel the feelings and go in the direction of joy. As always my angel friends, I wish you joy but I also wish you the patience with yourself if you are not in a joyful place. Taking a baby step in a direction is better than not moving as all.
Have an angel filled day my friends and don’t forget to ask!